Mother's funeral, May 2005

After suffering bilateral strokes, my mother endured for nearly two years before passing away on May 21, 2005. She was bedridden during the final months of her illness. Both Beaula and I were away during this period, and although I paid frequent visits from Hong Kong, they would not compensate for being at her side during her suffering. Towards the end, she was constantly calling for her father who had passed away in 1969. Dad, Mrs. G.M. Fernando, Sunanda (one of the women who took care of her), and I were at her bedside when she died.

During her illness, her main consolation were the daily visits from Bandaiyya (Mr. Ranbandara), my brother-in-law, who stopped by on his way to work. He brought "roast paan", a perennial favorite, which was eagerly shared by Bingo, a mutt that mother had adopted.

Mother must have been only 81 when she passed away. Her birth certificate says she was born in 1924.

These are some of the photos taken at her funeral.



Cecil, mother's only surviving (younger) brother with dad



Dad, Fawzia, & me


The casket about to be taken from the house. Besides dad and me, there's Bandaiya, Charlie (his son), Ananda (a friend of Beaula's), and Gemunu Athula, mother's nephew (son of her younger sister Irene)


Open casket at Kanatte Cemetery, Borella

Dad lighting a candle

Mother's lifelong friend, Mrs. G.M. Fernando and Shirley, Fawzia's sister, with Fawzia and me



View of the grave site. Kanatte appears to be an oasis of peace and quiet in busy Colombo. Mother had purchased the grave site, a 4' x 9' plot, in 1969 for only Rs. 150/. She buried her father there and always wished to be buried at the same site.

Travels in 2008

Dad loved cars and driving them. Although his only trip abroad was to Hong Kong in 2006, he drove everywhere in Sri Lanka, a habit that may have started with his mother's trips to Madhu church in the 1930s and 40s.

Although he may have driven to Mangalika Estate, Chilaw, till he was taken ill in October, 2008, his last trips on record were in June/July 2008, to Kandy and to Chilaw. In Kandy, he spent a few nights at Hantane in the house where he lived in the early 1980s, taking care of Roy while Fawzia and I were abroad. Roy was attending Trinity College. Dad and mother enjoyed their stay at Hantane. I'll write more about that later.


In this photo, he is seen taking part in a sing-song, another activity he enjoyed very much. Dudley Noordeen, Fawzia's cousin, is also in the photo.

Dad waving from among the shrubbery at Hantane. My parents had green fingers and they planted mango, avocado and other fruit trees along with lots of flowering plants.



With Fawzia at Hanatne, before departing finally from a place he loved and cared for.

Fawzia had bought a house at Digana, near Kandy. Dad visited the place, which was under construction. The young man in the center is Lenin, a sales person for the developer.

Dudley organized a gathering at his place in Chilaw. Here, dad is seen enjoying a sing-song with Gihan on the guitar.

This photo was taken at the "Beehive" in December 2008. After his hospitalization for a mild heart attack in October, dad recuperated at "Beehive", lovingly taken care by his niece Marie (in the photo) and her husband Bandara (in the photo). Beaula was visiting from the USA and she is also seen here.

More photos of the final days and funeral

When my sister Beaula, who lives in Tampa, Florida, heard about dad's illness, she returned to Sri Lanka in late May. Dad was diagnosed with terminal cancer on June 3.

In late May, dad was still strong enough to sit in the front yard after being taken there on the wheel chair.

With Beaula in early June

With two of his nieces, Delphine (on his right) and Marie (on his left). Delphine is his sister Kate's daughter, and Marie sister Rosie's. Delphine was on a visit from the UK.

I arrived late at night on June 13. This photo was taken around midnight.

Dad with his children

With his friend Justin Fernanado. Justin formed a close friendship with dad about two years ago. He was a frequent visitor and, despite being a busy businessman, spent much time with him, taking him on doctor's and hospital visits, lifting him on to the wheel chair, and in and out of bed.

Roy, dad's first grandson, arrived on June 16. Dad was fond of Roy and was laughing and joking with Roy.

From left: Roy, Beaula, dad, me

Fawzia praying at dad's bedside

Pius uncle with his wife Rita. Pius, who resided with Aunty Rosie's family, knew the history of the Braine family from the early 1950s. He is one of dad's last contemporaries still alive. The others are my mother's siblings Cecil and Irene.

Bandara ("Bandaiya" to us) keeping vigil. He is Marie's husband an, in the absence of Beaula and me, took good care of our parents

Champa and her daughter singing Methodist hymns. Champa is the daughter of my my mother's cousin Millie aunty. My mother was born a Methodist.



More Methodist hymns

Pearl, my mother's niece, who had taken care of dad during the last days. Going back 40 years, my mother's relatives were often in our home. Pearl first arrived in the 1960s.

The graveyard (Kanatte) in Borella, Colombo, where our parents are buried. It's a tranquil place in the midst of the dust and noise of Colombo.

Photos of the final days and funeral

Taken about a month before dad passed away. Beaula is on his right and niece Marie (from Boralessa) is on the left. Niece Delphine (daughter of his sister Kate) is in front.

These two photos were taken about three weeks before dad passed away.

With Roy on July 1. Roy was visiting from the USA.

With Beaula. She had arrived in late May from the USA and was with dad throughout his final days.

At home in Seeduwa

Fawzia

Visitors from Ambakelle, where dad managed an estate for the Coconut Research Institute in the 1960s

July 8 morning. Fr. Jayamanne and Fr. Rodrigo from St. Anthony's Church at the final blessing

Relatives singing Methodist hymns

July 8 morning. With Beaula

Beaula and Mrs. G.M. Fernando

Casket being carried to the gravesite at Kanatte, in Borella, Colombo. Relative Chryshantha and nephew Charlie are in front. The cortege left the house at 10am and reached Kanatte, a drive of about 20 kms, at 11.00.

The casket was opened at the grave site for a final viewing

Beaula's friend Swarna, cousin Marie, Rani, and Deepi (Charlie's wife). At the back is Latha, dad's faithful domestic helper for four years.

Charlie, Bandara, and musician Victor Ratnayake

Lalitha (Beaula's sister-in-law) with son Shan

After a short prayer, four hymns were sung, two in Sinhala followed by "Amazing Grace" and "Nearer my God to thee"

A final glimpse of the casket

Mervin Karunaratne, a family friend, delivering the eulogy in English. The Sinhala eulogy was delivered by cousin Gemunu Athula.

Beaula at the grave

Me at the grave

Fawzia lighting a candle

Prasanna, a close friend of my parents

Bandara, me, and musician Victor R.

With classmates from St. Mary's, Chilaw. Sarath Abeysinghe, Sharmaline Cooray and her husband Victor. Sarath and Sharmaline were my classmates in the mid-1960s.

Beaula with Mrs. G.M. Fernando and daughter Indrani. Mrs. F'do has been a family friend for more than 50 years. She and my mother worked at the Negombo Hospital in the late 1950s.

Fawzia, her sister-in-law Chandra, daughter Malki, Gihan, & Fati

Beaula, me, Victor, & classmates

Chryshantha and Sunil, a friend of Beaula's

Cousin Pearl, Anton (who helped with dad in the final days) & Prasanna


Cousin Gemunu Athula, who took the photos of the funeral